good things come to those who wait.

Shit son, I've been waiting so long my good thing better be the BEST THING EVER. Anyways, I think I'm about to make a big mistake. I think I'm about to do the something I know I shouldn't do. I think I'm about to give in and give up but I know better. But if I know better then why is it that I still want to go through with it? Is it stupid that even though I know I'll get hurt, I want to do it anyways? Is it because I have deep dark desires that I want fulfilled? Or is it that I'm a pushover and I just don't know how to say "NO!" I think it's a little bit of both but more of the desires thing. Is it wrong for me to want to be happy? Of course not. But here's the thing, the thing that makes me happy likes to make me sad too. So, is my short lived time of happiness really worth the pain in the end? That my friend, is the real question.