Today

was truly a painful day. First college calc test that I really thought I aced..yeah NOT SO MUCH! It wasn't fail but it wasn't up to my expectations. Hey I realized I have expectations now, first step towards making real goals maybe? :D After we got out Eddie had to go get his physical paper thing so yeah..got home around 12. Dalena planned on coming over and she brought Phily along (= I miss having friends! They took me to get food/hairdye. I spent like all my cash on the food so I hada use my card to pay for the hairdye & then I stopped at the ATM to get more moneyz. I like using my card, it makes me feel older. (= So we called Lina on Bella's phone before we left but she didn't pick up so we assumed she wasn't gonna come but then she came later when I was washing Dalena's hair in the sink. LOL Dalena had to lie on the counter and it was really funny but more of a "you had to be there" kinda thing. Our hair looks the same )= I left it in for a whole hour too! I hope it'll get lighter tomorrow. Anyways before Lina came over and after Phily left me & Dalena had some alone time where she gave me very unpleasant news. I mean I knew this day was coming and I thought I was prepared for it but apparently not..): So I didn't think this day could get worse but what do you know! It did! What are the freakin odds man, seriously. Whatevz. Nothing I can do about it now but it's so like...her? really? I'm glad that Dalena told me even though it kind of broke my already shattered heart because this reality telling me to wake the fuck up and get out of my dreamland. I think this means I need to step out of my comforting fantasy world and see life as it really is. This is God telling me to MAN UP! I gotta do what it takes to make me happy. And you know what would make me really happy? Finding someway to make myself realize the worthlessness of his character. Well my friend, I believe I have found the first real goal I plan on achieving. Yay me!

STAY UP
STAY TRUE
STAY BRUTAL
STAY MOTIVATED.